Okay, so I am feeling a little guilty. I know I don't need to, but I do, all the same. I think I missed one class period this semester, two at the most. I turned in all my work on time or early.I have a friend in the class who was only there a handful of times. She has not yet turned in the last two projects. She asked me to email those two projects to her. I know she was going to turn in my work as her own, and there's a huge chance the teacher would never know since he's grading 40 page documents. I told her I'd send them, as examples, very reluctantly.

I changed them from word docs. to pdf. docs. If she tries to cut and paste she's going to work almost as hard as I did. Here's the part where I get holier than thou. I did the bloody work, so can she.

Part of me feels really evil for that.

A dog and a jumble of pots.

my apostrophe & me

Really aint got nuttin' 'cept same ol', same ol'
I have one final exam to go, and I just did my last homework assignment ever
I went to Mayfest with the kids yesterday, for the first and last time. It was okay but once you've been why go back.

I envy people with beautiful gardens. Everytime I've gotten a good start on one I have ended up moving. I had intentions of starting one this year, but funds are limited. I might plant a few pots with something cheap and cheerful, like petunias. Maybe next year, which is what I said last year.

Sometimes it's hard not to be envious of coupledom too. And I get so pissed off when I see couples who aren't trying hard enough to make it work. They don't know how lucky they are. People forget what's important when the excitement and thrill of the hunt have worn off.

I'm scared to go job hunting. I know I can do the work but I'm worried about finding a job. How do I explain my lack of job history at my age.
I know once I do find work I might be able to finally relax. I haven't relaxed and let my guard down for two years, even when I've had nothing to do. I'm scared this is what the rest of my life is going to be.

I guess this is what any young student fresh out of school feels; I'm a late bloomer.
One foot in front of the other...

It's raining, it's pouring = no baseball game for grandson numero uno today.

I finished up my required internship hours on Thursday.

Uncle Sam raided my coffer.

Classes are doing their semester end whirlwind of activity. I can't believe this is my last semester and how quickly the 2 years have gone.

Graduation is May 18th. My parents are coming, and possibly my brother and his family.

Party time.

I drove from Weatherford clear to Azle last Sunday in search of the bluebonnet fields that were there in the past. On the way back to town I figured out exactly where they had been. It looked like the fields had been plowed over. I think I'll go looking for the ones Jarhead mentioned.

I need a social life. Where do you find one of those?

And a real job.

I am okay, Sili, just a little winded and confused.

Love After Love
by Derek Walcott

The time will come
when, with elation,
you will greet yourself arriving
at your own door, in your own mirror,
and each will smile at the other’s welcome,

and say, sit here. Eat.
You will love again the stranger who was your self.
Give wine. Give bread. Give back your heart
to itself, to the stranger who has loved you

all your life, whom you ignored
for another, who knows you by heart.
Take down the love letters from the bookshelf,

the photographs, the desperate notes,
peel your own image from the mirror.
Sit. Feast on your life.

This article in Texas Monthy is about the little Panhandle town I lived in. I first moved to Perryton around 1980 and left in 1988 thinking I'd never go back. Ah, but fate and oil field jobs have their own agendas because back we went for another 8 years in 1996. It sounds cliche but it really was a great place to raise children, and the second time around, to find a wonderful son-in-law.

Please don't make me move back there a third time, though.